Which would you like first?...

Good news or bad news?

How about the good news......

I'm here safe and sound.  Luggage arrived successfully,  hotel is great, weather is hot but manageable and the mango still taste as delicious as ever.    The transition was easy, now that I know what to expect and where to find things.

The bad news.....

I forgot my camera cord.   So no pictures to download.    I think I might know where to purchase one, so keep your fingers crossed.

I had a great day exploring the city yesterday.  I went to both of the major open markets and a few of the local temples. 

We begin shooting today and are pretty much jam on it for the rest of the week.   

I'll try to be a bit more descriptive tonight.

Thanks for the continued prayers!!!!

Same Song... Second Verse...

With my trip to Cambodia rapidly approaching I have had little time to stop and reflect that I am indeed going back there, but last night as I began to get my documents in order and start the packing process, I found myself being pulled back into memories and emotions of this time last year.

It's hard to believe that a little over a year ago had you asked me to point out Phnom Penh on a map it would have taken me a bit to even find what country it was located in.  

For many different reasons I am looking forward to this trip.  I feel like I'm so different than who I was last year.    As I look back to where I was at my life last year, I can see that I was living as a shell of a person.

Comparatively, everything about me last year seemed desperate, broken, and weak.

My faith was desperate.  My heart was broken.  And any hope for the future was weak.

Its hard to think back to that.   To remember why, and how.  

But this time, this trip, I have such different expectations.   

God's hand totally led the way last year.   While my faith was desperate, His was firm.  While I thought my broken heart would hurt forever, He had already begun the healing.  And my future while unknown (and still is) had (has) already been planned with eternal love.  

Its awesome to be able to have the opportunity to revisit a defining chapter in my life.   To look back and see the poetic "footprints".

I can't wait to see what God has planned for this trip :)!!!

ps.  I went to the Cardinals game on Saturday - IT WAS AWESOME!!!  My feet rested on the dugout - unfortunately the batteries in my camera died :(  

Soooooo......... 

"The guy" did end up handling the poop pretty well.  

Buuuuttttt.......

We're not dating anymore.   As Judy mentioned in the comments, sometimes, when dating we try to make things fit when they don't really.    It didn't.   

In other news I'm heading back to Cambodia for a quick stint March 6th-17th.  (I'd love tips on jetlag if anyone has suggestions)

I'm not returning to work with the same program.   I struggled a bit with the decision to go being that this trip is more geared towards humanitarian efforts rather than evangelical, but ultimately the chance to serve and help in making a documentary that will educate more people on what is going on in Cambodia was one I couldn't pass on.  

I've finally settled in South Florida, rented an apartment and purchased some furniture!

It's still hard to believe that I'm back living here.  

I'll post some pictures of the new place.

For all you Cardinal Fans the spring training stadium is less that 200 yards from my apartment!!  I missed Wednesdays opening game but have tickets to attend Saturdays game.  I'll definitely post some pictures of that!!

blog blocked

i'm blog blocked.  i don't know what to write about.

any suggestions?

Friends

One of my favorite things about blogging is the opportunity to keep up with friends and family.  

I've learned more about brother and sister-in-law via their blog than I have in weekends spent together.     I've shared in tears of joy and heartache with friends thousands of miles away because they blog about it.  I've had the chance to make new friends and rekindled lost relationships.

And because of this blog phenomenon, while in St. Louis over Christmas, I had the fabulous opportunity to meet up with these two bloggers....

Andrea, Kellie, and I have known each other for more that 16 (18?) years.    We've gone through TABS, summer camps, youth groups, boyfriends, cars,  and last but not least, jobs together.   I've sang with these girls, prayed with these girls, fought with these girls, and unfortunately lost track of these girls.

I can't speak for them, but when I sat down, and the three of us were together for the first time in many many years, I felt like I was putting something back in my life that was comfortable and familiar.   

Even though we are not as close as we once were, I knew I could still look at these two and share my secrets,  hear their stories, and be comforted by their presence.  

And I knew this, because, while we have all wandered our own paths, had some stumbles and lived different lives, the foundation of our friendship was built on an everlasting Rock.   

Kellie and Andrea,  I know this post is long over due, but I want you both to know how much I loved catching up with you.   I pray for you often.  My heart is filled with love and pride at what beautiful women and mothers you have become.    I'm saddened at the years lost, but so thankful for the grace and time we now share.

I can't wait to see you again!

Labels for this post: Mortified, TMI, Dating, & What Would You Do?

I have been contemplating over the past couple of days what to update my blog with. Most of the things going on as of late require lengthy explanations, and well.... I'm a lazy blogger.

However, I had an incident this morning that I might as well share, and maybe get some opinions on.  

Before I get to the said incident, let me preface first:

I have recently begun dating again.

I'm not good at dating. 

I mean, I like the social aspect of it. I love the free meals, entertainment, etc. BUT, I hate the post date anxiety. The "Did it go well?" "Did I talk to much?"   The dreaded "Is he going to call?" And let's not for get the "What am I going to wear?" stress!

Yet, just before New Year's I got over myself and agreed to go out with someone. And I really enjoyed myself. He was great! The dating was great! I don't think I talked to much and after some "is he going to call?" anxiety - he called!!  

After a few more dates, I started to think that maybe it wasn't going to be so bad - this dating thing. Maybe I could do this! He even understood and accepted me as a package deal with Truman!

So here I am starting 2009 with finally letting my guard down a bit, enjoying myself, getting to know this great guy and still getting spend some QT with Truman!

Life's good right?!

Let's fast forward to last night....

"The Guy" wanted to take me out to one of his favorite restaurants. It's down in his town, about an hour south of me. Since its a bit of a drive, I decided to bring Truman to his house to hang out while we go out.  

And the evening was great! I'll spare you the details of the date, but by the end of dinner I was really letting go of my anxieties!

About 20 minutes ago my warm fuzzy feelings just all came crashing down.

When I got a text from "The Guy".

Last night. Truman. Pooped. In. His. House.

Three. Times.

Twice. On. The. Nice. Dining. Room. Carpet.

I didn't see it. So it sat there all night until "The Guy" saw it this morning.



I'm mortified. Beyond mortified. "The Guy" is understandably a bit pissed.

I obviously offered to pay to have the carpet cleaned. Replaced even.

My question? Would this be a deal breaker for you if you were "The Guy"? He doesn't own a dog, is meticulously clean and now his carpet has Truman's # 2 on it.

Truman's now incarcerated behind bars for illegal dumping.

Just kidding buddy.  I still love you!

I Run.

I run for exercise.

But let me clarify.

I don't run because I necessarily enjoy it.

I don't run with a trendy jogging group or at a fancy gym. I don't run for the commercial health benefits.

No. I run for vanity.

I run so that I can eat a big plate of pasta. I run so I can have the french fries once an awhile. I run because I LOVE chocolate. Yes, I run so I can enjoy the glutinous pleasures but still fit into my 'skinny jeans'. I run so I can feel good about myself physically. Running for me, does not have much to do with the inner self, but more the physical self.

But running for me requires endurance.

I endure running so I can reap the benefits of the calories burned. I endure the occasional shin splints so I can eat one more bite of steak. I endure the extra early mornings so I can eat the unneeded appetizer of fried calamari. I endure so I can physically benefit.

But, honestly? I hate running. When I run, I argue, negotiate, bargain and even plead with myself. (I could make a stellar career defending those who didn't want to run just one more block.)

Moral of my running?

I endure, so I can reap physical benefits.

I feel like this is where I'm at in my relationship with God.

I'm enduring. I'm enduring because I know I need to. I'm enduring because I want the comfort that God promises those who are faithful to Him. I'm enduring because I'm learning real faith is a marathon, not a sprint.

To maintain my relationship with Him, I must endure. I can't run to Jesus once an month and expect HIm to fit!

So as I race into this new year I pray for strength and endurance. Not so much for my physical running, but my spiritual. Because that is the marathon that really counts!